FRINGE BENIFITS?

Everyone has to go there u ..me..ur uncle..ur grandma..ur maid..everyone(except rock stars of course!!!)

some1 made a movie about it..(remember Everybody says i'm fine...??)crappy movie but a movie nonetheless about it!

dil chahata hai made it popular!

and now Hritik,SRK and the bollyweird gang r bringing sexy back!

Ladies salons r fine i suppose..i suppose for a guy like me a ladies salon must be full of bitching,trash talk,manicure,pedicure blah blah blah...and the occasional girl on girl action!(i hope!)
but wait!

hold ur thoughts ..men's salons r nothing like a female "beauty parlor"
though the men's salon has evolved over the years..i keep my distance from it !! 250+ bucks for a haircut !r u shitting me!
I'm a lazy guy!i admit it openly!in fact.. i only go for a haircut coz the line of work in which I'm involved needs a strict grooming standards when it comes to facial and head hair.(i will out the not so pretty areas in which hair grows on a man's body out of this coz of reasons i cannot tell.)

Ok so lets begin!

As i mentioned earlier that i am a lazy,cheap guy wen it comes to haircut's i go to the neighbourhood salon for the alpha-males.

For the female readers of this blog i shall now reveal wat goes on in the He-mans salon r the silver scissors r the raju hair parlor..i hope the salon mafia don't read this r else next time they won't be cutting my hair ...they will definately drug me and give me a vasectomy..for sure!

But since i have decided to bear all here i shall not stop!

An avg men's salon consists of 4-5 not so comfy chairs..
a air conditioner that barely works..and if in any case it does decide to work it will definitely freeze a man's balls off!

The smell....
how do i describe it....
its a mix of cheap aftershave,even cheaper talcum powder,hair,sweat and sometimes of that ac smell u get!

The haircut man/guy..
he is a creature straight outta hells salon !
he is this guy who will always have a mouth full of ghutka a even worse haircut than wad the give me!
usually a guy from U.P OR BIHAR with always a interesting story to tell abiut yesterdays cricket match,r y sanju baba should not have gone to jail r how bush is a terrorist!

wen ever u go fr a cut he will always make it a point to tie the sheet thingy around ur neck as tight as possible..r till ur face turns blue due to lack of air intake in ur lungs and brain!

..and no matter how much u tell them that u want ur hair short and simple the will...and i mean they will not listen to ya and make u look like a extra in some mithun movie!

I as the shaky,impatient person i am always try to shake and move to that i can get over the ordeal ASAP!but they always wrestle ya back to the chair !
i always am scared that one day one of these guys will gut off my ear r summin!

..and some how to my displeasure i ALWAYS GET STUCK WITH THE NEW SHAKY,TRAINEE KID IN THE SALON!SHEESH!
In the salon while the guy is happily chopping ur hair which as it is ..is leaving its nest rapidly..i have to bear with the latest mujick in the dance bar circuit!
i mean i was ok with Altaf raja's ear jarring vocals earlier ,but with these nexgen guys it himesh dat calls the shots!

now i wish the guy almost cut my ear's off!

..and one thing that always bothers me is ..is the hair that falls on ur face...to clean ur face the man uses a highly unhygienic germ infested soft brush which i don't know has brushed the faces of god knows only..how many acne ridden teenagers,guthka chewing men,r sweaty bhaaiyas..
but i choose to ignore it thinking ..hell! i don't think during the ordeal at all!

..and finally when the cut is over the thing i still never put my finger on is...y does he have to take a mirror and show u the back of ur head???its not as if u can see it anyways! and even if he does cut it badly there's not much u or he can do about it!!!

..and these days to ensure custommber satisphaction the guy also throws a mini head massage in for free!
as if the hair on my head wer not weak ennuf he has to yank it out now!

i wish how there wer a easir way to do this but unfortunately Thar's not!

but from wad i hear the pricey salons r no good either!so the service it get for 40 bucks will have to do for the moment..r till i go bald!

and one more thing i still cant wrap my head around is y do grown men need fruit facial in a cheap ass salon???they still look like pigs ....

and last but not the least is why do daddy's have to take their young daughters to the guys salons of a hair cut????